BLOGS > Robyn Salisbury
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Robyn Salisbury Robyn Salisbury is a registered clinical psychologist and director of Sex Therapy New Zealand Ltd. In her private practice she has specialised in couples work and sex therapy for more than twenty years.As director of Sex Therapy NZ she heads a national referral network providing access to professional sex therapy. Robyn also provides specialist training in dealing with issues of sexuality for all health professionals nationwide. She is frequently invited to be a keynote speaker in national conferences and presents training workshops for special interest groups. She writes a weekly column on sexuality and relationship for the Sunday Star Times and a different fortnightly column Reflections on Sex for numerous dailies. Read more about Robyn>>> Visit Robyn's Sex Therapy NZ website www.sextherapy.co.nz Between the Sheets “Is THAT what YOU do?” has been a common question since the British drama focusing on the life and work of a sex therapist has been shown on NZ television.Usually the question is accompanied by a big smile and raised eyebrows. The TV1 drama Between the Sheets showed some fairly explicit illustrations of one of the problems that bring people to sex therapy and the work involved in resolving such a problem. read more>>> Finding Solutions to Sex Problems
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What is sex therapy and is there a need for it in the 21st century?
An orgasm diet plan, a personal best of 52 orgasms in one session and a title celebrating the results of “practical research”. Oh pleeeease, where will I start? A recent Saturday morning paper ran a whole page feature on so-called practical research into female sexuality which it was claimed, has produced some astounding results. 
I wonder how many people will have thought to give their relationship a Christmas present this year? Not their partner, their relationship. Before sinking into guilt or despair at the thought of one more gift to buy next year, read on. 
While I was waiting at the airport recently an enormously overweight woman sitting in front of me triggered some thoughts on the role fat can play for us. First were concerns about how she was ever going to fit into a tiny aeroplane seat and, I have to admit, some selfish concerns that she might be placed next to me! Then my reflections moved onto the role sexuality plays in obesity. 
From the moment we’re born, and perhaps well before then, relationship is an essential ingredient in our development. If your earliest years are spent with adults who know how to form a healthy relationship with you connections are formed in your brain and your belief system that provide you with the ability to be intimate. If those adults also know how to relate well to each other then you’ll have those skills modelled for you and to some extent they’ll come naturally when you enter your own relationships. 
Increasingly the internet is becoming the most popular way to meet new people. A Google search of NZ web pages on internet dating produced 453,000 results! I exited quickly: a person could get seriously lost in such a jungle.
“Isn’t therapy for Americans Robyn?” This was one of two questions asked recently that highlighted for me the gap between my view of my work and the understanding of uninitiated others. The second was “Why should people go to see a sex therapist when that’s hard work? It’s much easier to just get a pill.”
I was fortunate to hear an address this week by a psychotherapist who spoke very powerfully about envy amongst professionals. It got me thinking about envy and jealousy within romantic and sexual relationships.
Kiwi initiative and our ‘can-do’ attitude is a source of our national pride and rightly so. There’s a lot you can do with a piece of no.8 fencing wire. It also has its limits. Like when we delay asking for help with sexual problems because, “I thought I could fix it myself”. 
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DISCLAIMER The Let's Thrive website is not intended to replace professional advice.
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